Kaptein Skuim – Die man agter “Langarm Style”

Ek is ‘n fan van funny musiek.
My eerste tape -het die kasset nog vir krismis gekry- was daai Leon Schuster ene met “Hamanzamtouti” op. Ek het Weird Al Yankovic geluister asof dit in die ng kerk se nuutste her-hersiende liedboek was, en ek die liedjies moes ken vir Sondagskool.

Ek beskou myself as ‘n connoisseur van grappige songs, en het dus gladnie gedink “Lekker Vuilgat Treffers volume 3″ was enigsens snaaks nie. Iemand wie ek wel dink is snaaks, en nou al ‘n geruime tyd dophou, is Kaptein Skuim. Die eerste keer wat ek die man op die radio gehoor het, was ek jaloers, want ek wou dit ook doen. Jaloesie het egter vinnig plek gemaak vir “ag dis lekker geniet die liedjies“. Nou het die man waaragtig gaan staan en als net tot op ‘n nuwe vlak geneem met sy nuwe treffer, Langarm Style.

Ek het die voorreg gehad om bietjie met die lewende legende te gesels, en hier is wat hy kwytgeraak het:

BaasDeBeer: Dag Kaptein, thanx vir jou tyd. Kom ons skop sommer by die begin af… Give me the basics: Waar kom jy vandaan, hoe lank is jy nou al Kaptein Skuim, wat doen jy presies?
Kaptein Skuim: PREToria! Blou Bul! Martin [Bester] speel nou so 2 jaar al my pakkies wat ek daar [by Jacaranda 94.2] aflewer.

BdB: Kan jy moontlik bietjie meer uitbrei op wat jy doen, sodat iemand wat geen idee het wie/wat jy is nie, ook sal weet?
KS: Ek het so 2 jaar terug n pakkie vir Martin afgelewer en hy het dit gespeel. Dit was die Baby Tjoklits parody. Vandaar lewer ek elke week n pakkie af met n skuimcall, parody song of parody advertensie/tv shows ens. En ja, solank hy dit speel, sal ek aflewer!

BdB: Ek onthou daai Baby Tjoklits ene. Dis hy wat my so jaloers gemaak het… Hoe het Kaptein Skuim ontstaan?
KS: Ek sal die vraag na my ma’le toe moet stuur! Ek ken nie al daai detail nie

BdB: Ek moes so ‘n antwoord verwag het van ‘n funny-man… Is jy net deel van Jakaranda FM, of funksioneer op jou eie ook?
KS: Ek doen my eie shows ja, van feeste tot teaters. Ek skryf ook ‘n vervolgverhaal op JA.FM (Jacaranda Afrikaans) se website getiteld “My gunsteling Steve Hofmeyr”! Gaan basies oor ‘n drummer in ‘n band, met die naam Steve Hofmeyr en sy struggles om daai naam te dra. Mense is altyd moerse teleurgesteld om hom te sien! Ek is ook besig met my 2de album met songs en skuimcalls – die is nog naamloos!

BdB: Ok, so jy speel eintlik maar orals (en met almal as ek dinge so uitkyk). Wat’s die most memorable gig waarby jy al betrokke was en hoekom?
KS: Memorable… Jacaranda Pops, ek het ‘n kort verskyning gemaak maar dit was awesome, so ook die res van die show. Imagine Arno Carstens met n simfonie orkes… wow!

BdB: Klink legit. Maar sê my, kry parody artists regte fans, of is dit net die funny freaks wat jou stalk?
KS: Ha! Party mense hou baie daarvan, en ander HAAT dit. So dis fanmail en hatemail! Die volgende album is original!

BdB: Sien uit om dit te hoor! Maar wees nou eerlik, glo jy dat daar ‘n toekoms is vir musical-comedy in SA? If yes, hoekom is daar nie meer suksesvolle musikale komediante nie (en meeste van die wat probeer, suck)?
KS: Die ding met song-comedy is weird/moeilik…in die eerste plek moet jy eers mense kry wat vir jou sit en luister. As mense nie luister nie, is daar absoluut niks wat mens daaraan kan doen nie. Ek het al ‘n moerse snaakse song (volgens my) in ‘n raserige plek probeer. Dis hartseer. Dis die groot rede hoekom ek teater verkies! Parodies werk goed in daai opsig, as mense luister is dit hopelik snaaks en as hulle wil party kan hulle dans en luister anyway nie na die woorde nie maar na die wysie. Maar ja, daar is verseker ‘n toekoems.

BdB: Very valid point. Nou, jy skryf oor omtrent alles en almal. Is daar ‘n topic waarvan jy nooit sal fun maak nie?
KS: Ek glo as ek van A fun maak moet ek van B ook kan fun maak. As ek sekere persone uitlos oor ek van hulle hou of watookal die rede, doen ek nie my werk nie. Op die ou einde van die dag is dit net n GRAP! Mense neem die lewe heeltemal te ernstig op.

BdB: Mmm, ok, so ek wag vir jou liedjie oor terminale kanker… Op ‘n ligter noot, jy het onlangs uitgekom met ‘n parody weergawe van die super bekende hit, Gangnam style van Psy. Dis briljant, maar waar het jy die inspirasie gekry/hoe het jy op die idee gekom?
KS: Dis die boere se Gangnam. Almal het êrens in hulle lewe al die yskas rondgeskuif. By ‘n skoolsokkie, mandjiedans, troue, matriekafskeid of reunie! Die song moes gebeur, ek is net bly ek kon dit doen!

BdB: Blykbaar is jou weergawe besig om nogal groot te gaan?
KS: Die feedback is awesome! Die song versprei mooi regoor die land. Dit maak my gelukkig!

BdB: Ek sal die video wat jy onlangs gemaak het, hier onder aan die post sit… Maar vir eers, kan jy nou ‘n vers (kom ons noem dit ‘n rympie) op die spot opmaak oor al die VIP trunk-voëls wat so een na die ander medical parool kry?
KS: Hey, jy gee my ‘n idee vir ‘n song nou! Titel : Op die golfbaan is ons almal gesond!  By the way, dit lyk vir my of Selebi dalk rerig siek is though! Dis die stront van die land, met die trackrecord weet mens nie meer wat of wie om te glo nie!

BdB: Hahaha, awesome! Ek sal my royalty claim form vir jou stuur, dan kan jy die R1,20 oor ‘n jaar vir my oorbetaal… Maar moenie stall nie, laat ons hoor…
KS: Nou maar reg, hier kom hy… Op die wysie van “Under the boardwalk”:

Op die gholfbaan
Is ons almal gesond
Op die gholfbaan
Lekker vet en rond
Op die gholfbaan…gholfbaan….gholfbaan : )

BdB: Hahaha, awesome… Hoop dit haal jou show een of ander tyd. So, enige advice vir aspirante musical comics?
KS: Doen wat vir jou snaaks is! Die oomblik as jy begin comedy skryf (enige vorm van kuns infact) vir ‘n teikenmark dan vlieg die hart by die ruit uit. Ek glo die teikenmark sal jou vind en nie andersom nie. As dit wel vir jou werk, well done!

BdB: Thanx vir jou tyd, sien uit na jou album! Laat weet ons sodra dit klaar is!
KS: Altyd ‘n plesier, sal verseker so maak. En dankie vir jou gesig in my music video.

Nou ja maats, dit was my chat met Kaptein Skuim.
As jy die Kaptein in die hande wil kry vir bookings, of sommer net om hom te stalk:
Twitter: @diekapteinskuim
Facebook: Kaptein Skuim

Hier is die video vir Langarm Style:

Dudes of Hazard

These dudes are, well, hazardous. No jokes.

Before you ask, no, they are not a band, but I’m sure that if you ask them nicely they will do very weird things with your old guitar and drums. Like eat them.

You see, Dudes of Hazard is a group of  insane guys with nothing better to do than put their bodies (and sanity) on the line for some good, unhealthy fun.  You might think that they are just another Jackass ripoff. Well, maybe. But their video’s are much better presented. None of that “play the same 3 seconds over  and over and over for 12 minutes” stuff. It’s action. It’s quick. It’s happening! There’s also no rehearsed crap.

To put it this way: I don’t like Jackass. I like Dudes of Hazard. Point made.

The best part is, that they are open for dares. If you can think of something to do, odds are they will do it. Go on, try them out, you know you want to…

To give you a quick background, dudes of Hazard is situated in Ermelo, Mpumalanga, South Africa.  Of all places. But hey,  if there’s nothing to do in your town, you make your own fun.
They started their crazy antics in 2008, and have been going strong since then.

Members:

• Jo Vaara
• Chuck Morris
• Pete Pistol

To put the Dudes of Hazard to you in a nutshell, I can’t do better than to misquote their slogan:
“They try it  at home, so you don’t have to”

Links for your clicking pleasure:

• Dudes of Hazard on Facebook
• Dudes of Hazard on YouTube

I will, in the following 3 weeks, feature each Dude individually, as well as more of their latest videos. Be sure to check in again, and spread the insanity…

Now,without further ado, here’s of the first Dudes of Hazard videos :

Four Your Funny 2

Hi kids!

It’s that time of the month again. No no, not THAT that time of the month. This time of the month: Four Your Funny Time

• Four Videos
• Four Pictures
• Four Jokes
• Four dots after this sentence….

Remember, if you have any funy stuff, send it to me. If it makes me laugh, it will probably be featured in the next FYF. So, without further chit chat, here we go:

 

 

 

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What do you call a woodpecker without a beak?
A headbanger.

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Here’s a little tip that I thought would be interesting to share with you all to build up your upper body strength. It’s really easy and takes no time at all but works a treat.

Begin by standing on a comfortable surface, where you have plenty of room at each side. With a 2kg potato bag in each hand, extend your arms straight out from your sides and hold them there as long as you can. Try to reach a full minute, and then relax.

Each day, you’ll find that you can hold this position for just a bit longer.

After a couple of weeks, move up to 5kg potato bags.

Then try 10kg potato bags and then eventually try to get to where you can lift a 20kg potato bag in each hand and hold your arms straight for more than a full minute. (we are very proud, we are at this level)

After you feel confident at this level, put a potato in each of the bags.

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Q:   How many electric guitarists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A:   One, they just hold the bulb and the whole world revolves around them!

Q:   How many surrealists does it take to change a lightbulb?
A:   That’s easy – A Fish.

Q.   How does an American change a light bulb?
A.   He doesn’t.  He throws the lamp away and buys a new one.

Q:   How many nuclear war survivors does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A:   None, because people who glow in the dark don’t need light bulbs.

Q:   How many gorillas does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A:   Only one, but it sure takes a truckload of light bulbs!

Q:   How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A:   Only two, but the hard part is getting them into the light bulb.

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An American businessman was at the pier of a small coastal Mexican village when a small boat with just one fisherman docked. Inside the small boat were several large yellow-fin tuna.
The American complimented the Mexican on the quality of his fish and asked how long it took to catch them.
The Mexican replied “only a little while”.
The American then asked why didn’t he stay out longer and catch more fish?
The Mexican said he had enough to support his family’s immediate needs.
The American then asked, but what do you do with the rest of your time?

The Mexican fisherman said, “I sleep late, fish a little, play with my children, take siesta with my wife, Maria, stroll into the village each evening where I sip wine and play guitar with my amigos, I have a full and busy life, senor.”

The American scoffed, “I am a Harvard MBA and could help you.  You should spend more time fishing and with the proceeds, buy a bigger boat.  With the proceeds from the bigger boat you could buy several boats, eventually you would have a fleet of fishing boats.  Instead of selling your catch to a middleman you would sell directly to the processor, eventually opening your own cannery.  You would control the product, processing and distribution.  You would need to leave this small coastal fishing village and move to Mexico City, then LA and eventually NY where you will run your expanding enterprise.”

The Mexican fisherman asked, “But senor, how long will this all take?”
To which the American replied, “15 – 20 years.”
“But what then, senor?”

The American laughed and said that’s the best part.  When the time is right you would announce an IPO and sell your company stock to the public and become very rich.  You would make millions.
“Millions, senor?  Then what?”

The American said, “Then you would retire.  Move to a small coastal fishing village where you would sleep late, fish a little, play with your kids, take siesta with your wife, stroll to the village in the evenings where you could sip wine and play your guitar with your amigos …..”

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