Have you ever tried to hold some pastrami, pickles, cheese and mustard between two slices of Amstel?
It doesn’t work.
Beer is not really like bread.
Another lie we need to get out of the way sommer right now, is that eating is cheating.
It keeps you going for longer. This is a marathon, not a sprint (and yes, I realise the slight irony of using a fitness analogy in a post dedicated to mostly unhealthy things).
Therefore, eating at Oppikoppi deserves a special mention. It is, after all, important.
As someone that looks like the perpetual before-picture in a gym testimonial, I see myself as a bit of an expert when it comes to the whole eating thing. I also don’t like effort, especially at an event like Oppikoppi. So herewith, do peruse my list of food-related tips before heading off to that awesome bit of chaotic heaven near Northam:
- Braai – Especially if you’re going before Wednesday. Freeze your meat, take a small braaier, remember wood, lighters, bread, salt and some form of sauce. (Keep it basic)
- Bacon – Buy in 500g packs. Freeze. Pan on gas it in the morning.
- Chips/Crisps – work on 2 bags per person per day. You won’t eat it all, but sharing is caring.
- Canned stuff – Some like it more than others, but face it, a can of sweetcorn or spaghetti & mince is an easy, quick meal.
- 1kg Viennas and 24 rolls. Use sauce from braai-bullet. Might add bowl of pre-grated cheese.
- Marshmallows – Take two big bags. You’ll end up eating one coz you’ve got the munchies, and the other you can braai Voortrekker-kamp style. Do take sosatie sticks. The branch you break off was a latrine 10 minutes ago.
Coffee – The coffee bags that look like tea are perfect. Also, kettle that can go on fire/gas, and some long-life milk.- Rusks.
- Paper-plates, plastic cutlery and a pocket-knife/multi-tool, braai tongs and some tin mugs for the coffee.
- Braai-grid, spade and some form of table might come in handy.
- Drink WATER (so TAKE water).
- If you are in a bind, there are some lekker people missioning around the camping area handing out pancakes. Ask around, you’ll find them.
You might notice that the above could potentially cater for pre-Koppi, quick snacks and light eating. That is because you need to get your main sustenance at some of the legendary food stalls near the stages. It is how you do Koppi. Stop trying to think of an argument.
Stalls you MUST visit:
- BraaiBoy – He will be there in full force with his mate Borries, serving up tons of pulled pork burgers and kilometers of BraaiBoy’s signature boerewors. Grab a boerie, they’re awesome. BraaiBoy has also graciously agreed to play host to our annual #KoppiTweetup, so tweeps will meet there. The bonus of BraaiBoy at Koppi, is that he is not just a food stall, but a party-destination in itself.
- Burger Express – At least once at Koppi, have a legend burger. 500 grams of bacon stuffed onto a massive burger patty grilled to perfection. Add onions, mayo and some other stuff, and you have the makings of a true legend. And remember, a fest is not a fest without Burger Express.
- Kobus se Gat – I hope they will be there this year. They should be. Kobus saved my life one night. Stumbling tent-ward and hungry as fuck (I didn’t have someone write a nice post like this before I went to my first Koppi). I had fokkol geld, fokkol energy, fokkol fokkol, and they gave me the last bit of boerewors they had left after closing. Check them out for moerlekker spare ribs and legendary roosterkoeke.
If, between the 3 up here and the plethora other food stalls on the farm, you cannot find something to tickle your taste-buds and sustain you through the awesomeness, you are full of shit and don’t belong at Oppikoppi.
Now, I have to go and stock up for my Koppi experience.
See you in the dust!
By the way, if you want a list of bands I feel you should go see, take a look at this post Henno Kruger did on Running Wolf’s Rant.
Ed England also asked me a few Oppikoppi questions for his blog, Why-Ed
These urges to desire, crave, hunt and obtain are enough to drive any sane man nuts. (There’s a joke somewhere in that last sentence. Help me find it). The fact that the ladies use aforementioned boobs to their advantage doesn’t help either. The tease-game just makes the hunter more bent on winning.
BaasDeBeer's Blog 